Vanity of Thought

I thought that my thoughts are vain to be written. They have no meaning to be written. Well some people’s thoughts are meaningful to be written, but I consider my personal thoughts to be in vain and to be meaningless and to be useless to be written. Yet the idea of vanity cannot be universal to all of my thoughts, for there has to be one idea that is not vain, that is the idea of vanity itself. The idea of vanity is valuable that it is true about all other thoughts of mine, that they are vain to be written. So why am I writing this vanity, simply to be vain? I have been affected by so many people that I cannot trace them back.

I am writing this to announce my desire to write, despite the vanity of my thoughts. I am writing to announce that I will write in spite of my recognition of my vanity. Then, any worthy thought must be have its basis somewhere. I think my thoughts to be vain because I see that they are worthless compared to the great Word of God, to Christ, and also to the thoughts of the saints who are in communion with Christ. I know myself to be in divorce from Christ due to mortal sin, so I am no saint, I am not in a state of grace. The thoughts of the saints are like extensions of the Mind of Christ, the Word of God, or expressions in our human reality. They are thus valuable and worthy of writing and contemplation, my thoughts, on the other hand, are not so.

Yet I choose to write, and write, and write, in the hopes that one day I will be able to reach some sort of value, and produce some sort of writing which is pleasing to God in His eyes. That is why I choose to write, out of Faith, Hope, and Charity in God that He will one day transform my being to make good writings for Him and His people, the Church, and the rest of humanity. So, after for so long not making any writing worthy of myself, or of God, here I am, to write once more. O my God, please accept me and my works, however terrible they are.

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